Say no to boxes

No, I'm not moving! I'm talking about the little boxes that companies and organizations insist on squeezing you into, sealed with a tick. Whenever I'm forced to fill in my details, like with the long-winded process of renewing insurance, I always object to it. I've always been against 'labelling' people anyway--white, black, gay, straight, married, spinster (such a horrible word)--our complicated lives rarely fit completely into a single box. But, especially in recent years, it's become a particularly sore point. Let me explain.

I've gone through school, college, and many exams with the aim of becoming a zoo keeper, and when I left college I found a zoo job almost immediately. I've worked in several zoos, I met my husband in a zoo. I am a zookeeper. And I love it.

But when I had children, I naturally had to take a break. I wanted to be there for my kids when they were young, and we couldn't afford childcare. So I stayed at home and became, to all intents and purposes, a housewife. I always still thought of myself as a zookeeper--just taking a break. Of course, the little boxes don't take 'breaks' into account. I couldn't tick zookeeper, but I did find out that the PC term for housewife now is 'Home-maker' or 'House-person.' Worse, every time anyone asked me about work, they seemed to look down on me for being at home. Like it's not a proper job. I think people forget just how tough it is. Although being a zookeeper is very hard work, raising children is one of the hardest jobs in the world. Also one of the most rewarding. Watching them grow and blossom into little people. I certainly never resented looking after my children, but it isn't all that I am. I'm a zookeeper, with kids.

After a few years, I was able to go back to the zoo for one day a week when my mother was able to look after the children. My little slice of 'me' time. However, things took a turn for the worse last year when my health went downhill, and I had to stop my blessed one day a week at the zoo. Dizzy episodes and a general lack of energy had doctors looking into every kind of potential condition, from anaemia, to MS, to a brain tumour. Months of tests, needles, scans, and finally I had an answer.

CFS.

Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, also known as M.E.

I know it could be worse. I don't have an inoperable brain tumour, or MS, but this has changed my outlook and my life considerably. I can't work, I can't run around with the children, some days I can't even make it up the stairs. The severity varies from day to day, and it could potentially go on for years. I have to walk with a stick, and use a wheelchair on days out. I hate being stared at. The fact that it's an invisible condition, like depression, makes things worse, and, worse still, some people still don't even believe that it is a medical condition. They think it's all in the head. I'd like them to wear my shoes for a few weeks and see for themselves. It's crippling. The fact is I don't know when I'll be able to go back to work, or even if I'll be able to.

But I'm still a zookeeper. And, despite whatever little box I'm forced into, I always will be.

The 'P' Word

No, this isn't related to sex ed! This word is something which all zoo keepers have to deal with in their line of work. The public.

Zoos obviously need visitors - they bring in vital funds to pay the bills and to care for the animals - but dealing with them can be stressful for us! Take zoo warning signs for instance. They're there for a reason, and yet so many zoo visitors think it's okay to ignore them. You expect it from children, but often it's the adults who are putting their children over the safety barriers to 'get a better look' or letting the children feed all kinds of things to the animals. When we politely ask them to stop, nine out of ten reply with, "It was only a bit of banana" or "It was only a scrap of bread."

What people don't understand, and what we have to then explain, is that zoo animals are on strictly controlled diets. If you feed 'a bit of banana' to a leaf-eating monkey, for instance, you can kill it. No, not all monkeys eat bananas, folks. Also, many have medical conditions (like diabetes) that restrict their diet further. And, even if they can eat what you hand over, if everyone gives 'just a bit' then these animals will get morbidly obese very quickly.

The other thing that always astounds me is the complete lack of education, and I'm not just talking about kids. Often we overhear adults telling their kids the most ridiculous things, which, though sometimes very funny, leave me feeling exasperated. For example, and believe me this is true:

Child: "Dad, why do the penguins have those metal things on their wings?"
Dad: "To stop them flying away."

*facepalm*

Worse, often they're standing right next to a sign which gives them the correct answers but so many people don't bother to read them. It's unbelievably frustrating for us. Please, if you want to know about the animals (and you don't want to read the signs!) just ask us. We like nothing more than telling you all about our animals. It's our passion.

Then there are those members of the public who don't agree with zoos at all. The protesters. They think it's wrong to keep animals in cages, and that we're only there to make money, which simply isn't true. The primary goals of any good zoo is conservation and education. Our zoo actually makes a loss every year, but keeps going because it's making a difference. It has very successful breeding programs for endangered species, actively reintroduces species back into the wild, and has conservation and rehabilitation reserves around the world, both to smooth the process of reintroducing captive-bred animals and to take in rescued wild ones.

Species are becoming extinct 1000 times faster now than they did before humans were around. Without zoos many more species would be extinct by now. The future is in our hands, and it's our duty to repair some of the damage the human race has inflicted upon our world. I just hope it's not too late.

The best job in the world?

People always say I have the best job and, for me, it is... but not for the reasons they think. We don't spend all day cuddling animals and bottle-feeding babies, for a start. Let me tell you - day in, day out, it's a hard slog for very little money and, yes, primarily it's clearing up poop. Volunteers are usually taken aback at that: 'What? No cuddling?' :P We have to work holidays, even Christmas, because animals will always need feeding. We stay up through the night with the sick and get up every few hours to feed rejected babies, without getting paid overtime for it. We work in all weathers, struggling through wind, rain, and snow to make sure our animals are well-cared for.

And, despite all that, I wouldn't want to be doing anything else. I've always loved animals, and the chance to be close to and befriend so many weird and wonderful species is, for me, a privilege. They become like close friends - we share in their joy and weep for their loss. A zoo keeper's love for animals is also her downfall, and having to deal with the deaths of many animal friends across the years can take its toll. But, like a doctor, you have to care to be able to do your job properly. The day I stop mourning the animals I lose is the day I stop being a zoo keeper.

Of course, there are also moments (like when you're playing with a baby gorilla, for instance) that you think, 'Wow, I'm so lucky.' We never take that for granted. Above all, we have the greatest respect for the animals in our care and, in many cases, that respect is clearly reciprocated. So, yes, we do have the best job in the world. I'm certainly never going to give it up. :)

Allow me to introduce myself...

This is me. Wife, mother, zoo keeper, writer, and multi-tasker. Despite my love for writing, I've never been good at keeping up diaries. I think the longest I kept going was six months. However, I'm going to try to put as many of my random thoughts here as I can. There will no doubt be a lot of nonsense, but hopefully it will be something interesting to look back upon in future years... or a source of amusement. So, let's begin.